Laura

Every child will go through the stage of, what most people would call, the “Terrible Twos.”  The terrible twos can occur anytime after the child has turned one year old, and sometimes earlier.  It is hard to believe, but the terrible twos is in-fact a good thing.  It is a sign that your little one is growing up mentally; simply put, the terrible twos is a development stage that your toddler is experiencing. 

Babies will often mimic the people around them.  You smile at them and they smile back.  You say “woof, woof” and they say “woof, woof” too.  Then one day, your child begins to push you away and disagrees with just about everything that you have to say.  When the terrible twos begin you’ll know it.  Welcome to the terrible twos!  

It is important to understand why the terrible twos are occurring.  This development stage is occurring, because the child does not have the ability to ask for what he/she needs.  His/her language skills are not well developed enough.  This is frustrating to the little one.  He/she needs something but doesn’t know how to ask for it, which often results in hitting, biting, and temper tantrums.  The child is not trying to be intentionally bad or disobedient; it is their way of trying to get what they need.

Exploration and independence is your little one’s goal.  They will disagree with you and they will often disagree with themselves.  They will say “no” when they sometimes mean “yes.”  How confusing and frustrating for the parents?  Understanding the terrible twos is important, because it will help you to cope with what seems to be a terrible time.

Some tips for making the terrible twos not so terrible:

·        Keep to a set routine everyday.  Your child can know what to expect and when to expect it.

·        Limit choices.  As the parent, you have to be in control, but give your little one the opportunity to feel as though he/she is in control sometimes with decision making.  For example, let them pick what they want to eat.  Say, “Do you want a banana or an apple?” Instead of saying, “What do you want to eat?”

·        Set limits.  Set limits, but do not be surprised when your toddler pushes the limits as well as your buttons. 

·        DO NOT GIVE IN TO TANTRUMS!  If you give into your child’s tantrums you will be prolong the tantrums.

·        Time-out and lack of privileges.  Use time-out or take away a privilege when your child is misbehaving.

·        Safe environment.  Set-up a safe environment and let your child learn and explore freely.

·        Avoid “yes” and “no” questions.  Asking “yes” or “no” questions is simply asking for trouble.

Understanding what your little one is going through is key.  Do not get upset at your little one for learning and exploring.  Let them become their own person and encourage their development.

For more information about your child’s mental development visit http://pediatrics.about.com